I love it when a plan doesnt come together, there was no plan, but we gathered at our favorite trashy girlscout hangout anyway....

Gi - Jane smelling lylacs - apparently sniffing something, CHris (needs a name - CC Conetmplating Chris), Lila (ML - MonaLila), CBS - or Mr Drive Thru, or Happy meal (hes always smilin), actually he used to be little weenie steve, but how about Crazy wheenie steve - it has ring to it (the name not the wheenie... Im in rare form, all hyped up on msg and starbucks decaff... , Puke, PMD, LUTC (thats loyd under the covers - been a while since he made a recap).. Dat everyone?? Well Gstring, Lawn boy and Dead beat steve CONVENIENTLY missed our ride for there own little trist on the green door trail....

I did call Tony Hawk EGM, but I assume he has a good excuse, like he was xmas shopping for the little evil one ...

So Up the hill to warm up, then another hill, at the top Jane lets me know that every time he sees PMD she drops her pants, I agree, one of her finer qualities.. Its cold out... Burrr Freakin her, but warmin up nicely.. My defective rear view mirror temperature guage said 43 degrees my arse man..

Metavomit trail - this is the metavomit - welcome to the metavomit

Slug, to QM new drop, should have been in QM 2.. Up to chair stunt, LOTS OF TAKERS - holy crap - ML cleans it, PMD, LUTC and of course Jane and puke and CBS, not sure about CC contemplating chris, im sure he thought about it... Up to the mini roller, Me CBS and PMD train down it like its nothin.. Nice job, ride on to crash test nemesis - the glory pole, I onsight it but just so I can get that overwith and take some pictures of the crew ..

Behind the green door trail - Whoever built this trail is a freakin Genious

Nice ups and downs, 3 footer with bail ramp, I bailed, GI dropped, CBS feelin the little wheenie but not the wheelie drops.. Did I mention GI's fasion statement of the year wear.?? He must of heard about the bikerag award for queerest free rider of the year award.. A nice creamsicle orange vest onsamble with fantastic purple pecker jacket .. I regress - back to the trail - balance beam log, I QM-ed yesterday, woosed twice but once I saw GI clean it I had to follow with convincing style and creamy stool poo poo ease... Horshoe, knife edge (only Jane would be stupid enough to clean that one today), triple combo - CC nails!! Nice.. Me?? I was busy taking pictures michael jackson style, no not with my hands down young boys pants, with one glove you fools.... PMD gets the off camber slug, Sam too, and the rest actually.. LUTC riding well today, in front even, were freakin too slow for him, must be that new 9 croisant a day diet that fuels him in sub zero temps...

Run into some of janes friends at the end, CBS and jane hit the 3 foot jump, Jane airs SKY HIGH.... Oh la la - I wish I could speak spanish and continue ....

Back on the vomit, PMD hits the big nose rock.. To spur, lots of log riding, I flash the captains log and Stink Finger, and not with the camera... Jane fires em up too, CC and CBS get 99% of it after few tries.. PMD gets to second base..

Magnet stunt, many takers again, Jane CBS puke... To red, to blue we wait - as Lila and PMD come up the hill we hear LOTS of loud exhaustive perky screaming and moaning that seemingly lasted forever.. So thats how ML got her name..

Oh yeah, Kona was there too, the wonder dog, even gave me some quick oral for copious amounts of peanut butter that I keep in my jockstrap on days like this...

Blue up blue up blue we are riding up blue.. iTs getting colder and my balls are blue blue blue.... My bike is stuck in middle... Focking thing... And I thought those 8 speed xtrs should last forever... So the girls are at it again, working on a bike in the valley (GI wonders if a tampon was involved), then we wait for CBS to huck, he does, pretty sweet - 6 footer.. CC QMS, uno dos tres quatro, not feelin it so we ride on.... Jane shows CBS the rock jump I assume, then hit the big ugly 7 footer that claimed one of ankle biters testicles in years past...

Yada yada yada - to lookout, Jane dabs on the hard up, ( Yes I cleaned it for the record, actually im lying, I dabbed twice yesterday and barely once today, but I did make it 3 inches further...) And just ask any woman what 3 inches means to them....

ML's bike is all sorts of froked up, chain stuck in the crack, hangar bent, took the whole team to semi fix it... Onward - Lookout - OK I joke about taking a pose shot in front of the city, Someone takes me surealeously - new word again, when your serous but in a strange and demented way??.. CC hits the 2.5 er to snow, me too, CBS hucks it because thats what he does... Back homo on the chimney trail.. I suffer in middle and even get it up the switchback.. Cold downhill home.. Great ride... We see DBS with his OLD bike on top of his car, then run into Gstring and lawnboy... Shwag giveaway in the parking lot, GI is FINALLY worthy of a premium blend window sticker..

PMD and I went out for chineese - my fortune of course was "Theres a good chance of a romantic encounter soon", so since PMD will be shopping with her sister tonight - get your mind out of the gutter people - SHE says "the only romantic relationship your having is with your hand"... Tears I tell you tears in my eyes...

Rating, Just 5 deep fried mozzerella or cinderella tampons with whoreganic breading and marinara sauce (on the side) for dipping... You can get them at the macaroni grill I hear...

PM

PS - Welcome new riders to the bikerag nickname posse' - hope you enjoy the future years of ridicule on your behalf...

PSS - Jane - Hope I didnt hurt your feelings with all the outfit ridicule, I really liked it, wanna go out some time - Tomorow - somewhere different - IN the woods - meshomasic.... Tyler mill?? Danger girl will take pics...

PeeM